| I really dont like driving..... |
[12 Aug 2005|11:23pm] |
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mood |
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 numb |
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So Amber and I were driving down 17th oh say around 9:17 there was a small car infront of us when all of a sudden a blue car that was supposed to stop went flying through the stop sign and smashed into the car in front of us. The car in front of us spun and hit a pole. Me and Ambers mouths dropped, I put the car in park turned on my hazard lights and ran to help the people. Neighbors started coming out to call 911, it was terrible the drivers side was smashed in, the passenger was somehow flipped on her stomach. She was lying face down in the backseat while her husbands body was squished towards the passenger seat. He was really bad, He was barely breathing and all you could see was him spitting up blood. The whole time I was trying to talk to them and ask them questions the keep them awake. The 3 people in the blue car took off on foot running. I never even saw what they looked like but friends of mine that came to see what happen said it looks like a friend of mines car, and I found out that seconds before that happened two girls were walking and they said the blue car was swerving. The couple are in critical condition and i dont know if they caught the kids yet. Amber and I had to stay there for two hours because we were the only two that actually witnessed it. I am so shook up, it keeps playing in my mind over and over. I just feel so bad, and I really want to know if the couple are okay. What really scares me is that the van has been acting weird lately like it sometimes wont let me go over 20, so I was going pretty slow. Now if the van was fine I would have been right behind the car in front of us (I like to be right behind people if they go to slow)yes I know that is very stupid of me. But if it wasnt for the van being gay Amber and I probably would have been hit as well. I had to drive Amber home not too long ago and the whole time I was shaking and driving like 20mph cause I was so scared. I could really use a hug right now.....
*My prayers go out to the older couple*
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[09 Aug 2005|07:29pm] |
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mood |
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 disappointed |
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So I saw this guy today, which I thought I wouldnt like him if I saw him again. But it turns out I'm even more attracted to him now then I was before. Blah.........I hate it
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[07 Aug 2005|09:46pm] |
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So I have driven by your house like 28473729 times and your never home! grr, it makes me angry. What you need to do is c/m and come by cause I really wanna see ya. at least to say hi or just make out....Kidding,or am i?! haha, Please c/m(7140307) I'm leaving next monday(most likely) you have till then<3
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[02 Aug 2005|12:15am] |
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mood |
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 sleepy |
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I miss you, I need you just so I can get away from all of this. Are your feelings just as strong as mine were for you the first day we met? </3
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| Songs/memories that remind me of people |
[27 Jun 2005|08:36pm] |
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mood |
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 ehhh?? |
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Josh Story-That one techno song that says "this is the police, this club is closed forever", and whenever I hear Poison The Well. Hawaii, Star tattoos, taking me to get my lip pierced, Chingy
Ryan Goodwin-Obviously any type of drug reminds me of him, but also when I see candle holders I think of ryan and just laugh. Skipping class and going to Bayshore, X-treme Bowling, Any techno song.
Ryan Urch-Hunch Punch, that damn "Hey Ya" song, and Hoobastanks "The Reason", fishing, applebees
Charlie-Okay, so if I hear the word anal I think of Charlie. Mushroom head, Mortal Kombat, Coke and Combo's, Home Depot, I could go on but I'll stop.
Josh K.-Final Fantasy, Incubus "Hear in My Room" a few others.
David Goldman-Lilo and Stitch, Finding Nemo, Justin Timberlake "Cry me a River", System of a down, Albertsons, A Lot more....
Jon-Sean Paul- "Get Busy", Brad Paisley- "Mud On The Tires", Family Guy, Aqua Teen HungerForce, Lovespell, always wanting to "make-out", a few others but those are the main ones.
I dont feel like doing anyone else...I could put amber but the list would go on and on so thats good enough
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| Whatever.............I know its gay |
[26 Jun 2005|01:20am] |
okay, so normally I write poems/songs/(or whatever you want to call it) when I'm angry or sad. But tonight was a different story. I got bored and I started to write and when I was done and read it, I said to myself damn, this is mean. But its not a true story(well it might be somewhere else) so here ya go:
Are you still the same from before, smoking crack and selling whores? Its weird how people change but not you, you're still the same. Tap the needle and find the vain, stick it in and feel the pain. Are you happy watching yourself waste away? There was a time when you didn't need drugs to get high. Remember when your son was born and you cried with tears of joy. Well keep crying old man because your dead to him. I told him daddy died a good man, little does he know what a worthless piece of shit you really are. I tried getting you help but you refused. I'll help you one last time. Here's $500, have fun and buy whatever drugs you like. But just remember when you're shooting up to think of your son and all the memories you missed. Oh, and also think of me screwing your brother. Yeah, I said it. I Hope You Choke On Your Misery!
So thats that one, and then the next one I'm not done yet. But here ya go anyways:
"Behind These Eyes"
If you could only see behind these eyes
You'd realize there's nothing but lies.
I've tried to let them fade away,
But the truth makes them want to stay.
If you knew what I have done,
You'd want to scream or up and run.
I need you
I miss you
I want you
But these lies behind my eyes
are more than I can take
If there was only a way for you to forget
about the lies and want to stay. (not finished)
So if any of you read this which I doubt please comment to let me know what ya think. Thank you
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| Hot Damn |
[24 Jun 2005|01:32am] |
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mood |
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 amused |
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So I was told that I have nice DSL's. Goal achieved, yesss! haha no, but that was funny.
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| I'll be more than shocked if anyone reads this. I doubt anyone will |
[27 May 2005|06:13pm] |
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mood |
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 creative |
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If you dont know me that well, now you will.
-I love music, If I could marry it I would(but I'll settle for a band member)
-I am addicted to buying cd's even when I'm dead broke
-I love to laugh
-I love to dance when no ones around
-I live for roadtrips
-I love making people laugh
-I can tie a cherry into a knot
-I can never have enough lip gloss
-I like to shop alone
-I love snow
-I love when guys wear cologne
-I dont like repeating myself
-I've never broken a bone
-I own more sweaters than you
-I am the biggest klutz(I ran into a wall nuff said)
-I hate making eye contact with people
-I love making out
-Mountain Dew and Propel Water own me
-I am vain, I'm constantly looking in the mirror(Dont ask why,plus I'm not even pretty)
-My hair color changes more than a rainbow
-I miss getting high
-I have a stalker
-I regret a lot of my past
-I dont smoke cigs. but I still smoke blacks
-I only write poetry when I'm pissed or sad
-I love acting ghetto
-I love piercings but I freak out before getting em
-I want 37463 tattoos but I only have two
-I dont have many friends
-I love to smell good
-I can be sarcastic
-I think pornos are funny
-I love to clean
-I cuss like a sailor
-I hate humidity
-I'll kick your ass if you break my nails
-I love getting my hair pulled
-I daydream all the time
-I hate sleeping at night
-I'm deathly afraid of spiders
-I wash my hands constantly
-My biggest fear is being buried alive
-I tried to kill myself
-I love to sing(when no ones around)
-I'm good at cooking
-I dont want kids but if I did I would adopt a baby black boy(they're cute)
-Yes I still like Good Charlotte, Simple Plan, and Yellowcard
-I have a purse fetish
-I dont want to get married
-My favorite t.v. show is Veronica Mars
-I haven't done anytype of drug for two months
-I hate getting drunk
-I dont go to church
-I'm afraid of heights but I love roller coasters
-I no longer straighten my hair
-I love wearing colored contacts
-I like having boyfriends but I get bored too easily
-I'm afraid to ever love someone again
-I love keeping secrets from others
-I hate driving on highways
-I like fishing but I hate seafood
-I love the smell of gasoline
-I hate leaving voice messages
-I love chucks
-I only like 5 veggies
-I love turning up my music really loud so everyone can hear
-My family is hawaiian(lots of alcohol, food, and loudness)
-I want a BMW M3 for my birthday okay?
-I miss summerfield more than you know
-I have 2 points on my license
-I hate coffee
-I'm addicted to chewing gum
-The most I've won from a scratch ticket was 50$
-Michael Jackson scares me
-Almost evey shirt I own is black and has a bands name on it
-I love to mosh, but hate getting hurt
-I dont like to cry
-I sleep with a spongebob pillow
-I'm afraid of growing up
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| I'm fading and no one even knows yet |
[05 May 2005|09:41pm] |
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mood |
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 aggravated |
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Do you ever feel like your losing everyone you love. And your also losing yourself. I dont know who I am anymore. I love it here in Seattle but sometimes I feel so alone. Its my fault for not opening myself up to anyone I meet, I just dont want to. I cant move back to florida because I will just feel like a failure. If I do go back I'm just gonna go back to summerfield and go to MCC. God I just dont want to grow up, I need to find Peter Pan and Tinkerbell and have them sprinkle that dust shit on me.
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| Hey Kids! |
[02 May 2005|12:51am] |
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mood |
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ecstatic |
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Yes! I'm alive.I finally got my computer set up. Its taken like what five months it seems like. But now im back and I feel like I have lost touch with everyone. Which for the most part is true, the computer for me was easy communication. So I would love to hear from all of you. Tell me if there is anything new in your life or what you have been doing. <3
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| What a night.. |
[06 Feb 2005|04:22am] |
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mood |
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 exhausted |
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Honestly I thought tonight was gonna blow. But I had such a great time with everyone. It was nice to see all the summerfield crew again, and especially the old ones! I met so..many different people that I never thought I would like but I ended up talking with some for the rest of the night. Joel however got on my damn nerves. And just to let everyone know he is alive, I had to drive him home. I loved-loved-loved the drinking game(I'm normally not the drinking game type but that one was fun) I'm so tired, its 4:30 and there are still people over there and they even bought more alcohol. I think that is the first time we finished the entire hunch punch mixture. Thanks to whoever reads this that came and I hope that we can hang out again before I leave.
*I did some calculations and around 45 people came to the party tonight..crazyness*
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| Mud on the tires... |
[30 Jan 2005|12:40am] |
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mood |
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 mellow |
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Well I'm home sweet home. Its nice to be back, and see everyone. Seems like I've been gone for a while but really its been three months, My goal is to hang out with everyone i can before I leave so please c/m if you wanna hang out! (Jon I didnt forget about you dont worry I'll call) There is something wrong with me because lately I have been listening to country. And I used to hate country, I liked a few songs but now I have actually bought two country cds. Its scary! I'm Ashamed :/
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| You Always Looked So Good In Blue |
[06 Nov 2004|07:39pm] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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So as I was on the plane from Newark on my way to seattle, I said to myself..
What the hell am i doing? I dont want to actually live in seattle! But then I started thinking about how different things are going to be and I was fine. Its just scary because the past couple of nights I have been spending time with my family watching movies and other stuff, but i am so used to talking to my friends or hanging out with them. Thats the only thing that sucks..
I cant go on the computer a lot which sucks but whenever i can i'll try to talk to people.
Happy Birthday Jon I hope your party is a blast! <3333
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| Everythings Cold Looking... |
[30 Oct 2004|02:36am] |
Its weird going into my room. It used to be filled with so much shit but now its just empty! It makes me sad, but at the same time happy. I shipped my boxes out the other day 169.40 not to bad to ship 5 boxes that weighed in between 30-50lbs. Oh! And I closed my Southtrust account and opened one at Bank of America, Its cool because now i have an actual debit card instead of a gay ass ATM card.
I hung out with Charlie, Josh, Jon and others tonight. It was fun, i was disappointed that we didnt get to see the movie SAW but thats alright because at least I got to hang out with them one more time. I will miss them<33
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| I think I like you.. |
[30 Oct 2004|02:33am] |
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mood |
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 horny |
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I wanna fuck like we've never fucked before!! You know who you are ;)
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| Twinkle, twinkle, little star..... |
[12 Oct 2004|07:42pm] |
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mood |
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disappointed |
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Have you ever liked someone that not too many people felt the same way about?
This guy I "like" used to have semi long hair. Back then I didnt even think twice about being attracted to him. I didnt see him for a while and then out of nowhere he came to see me. He cut his hair really short, and now whenever I see him I can't help myself but to stare at him constantly. Its weird. He is so nice to me, and I think he might like me but in a way I dont want him to know that I like him. Just because it would be pointless since i'm moving soon. But then again I could just always make out with him hehehe
Oh, and dont ever go to Halloween Horror Nights. It sucked! (I had tons of fun) but the whole wanting to get scared and crap never happened. I felt like I was in China because there were so many people there! Hallowscream is so..much better. The next time I want to go to something like that I'm going to go drunk!
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| Day 28... |
[07 Oct 2004|12:32pm] |
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mood |
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 energetic |
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I'm excited for 2morrow to come. Halloween Horror Nights! yay....Its going to be cool staying in a hotel. aww I feel so grown up, haha cuz i'm able to stay at hotels and crap.
Anyways..
I have been calling just about everyone I know to just talk, and see if they want to hang out with me before I leave. I'm supposed to hang out with 7 people next week. It would be so much easier hanging out with everyone all at once. but I am looking forward to some alone time with certain people. Just to catch up and what not.
"Have you ever felt alone...Well I have!"
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| My rabbit got loose and I thought it was a rat running across the floor! |
[30 Sep 2004|02:36am] |
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mood |
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exhausted |
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So I just got back from the Three Days Grace show, ahh I love that band. And the singer is hawt! I almost got killed in the mosh pits, and some drunk guy was trying to crowd surf, and he kicked my head somehow his shoelace got stuck on my earring and riped it out. Just a little bit of blood not too much.
I talked to my dads friend Jay today and he was at the studio in orlando recording and hanging out with remembering never. I told him to hook me up with some autographs from that band. I like them! Oh and my dad is gonna hang out with Static X and Drowning Pool this weekend. I guess they are all playing up in Orlando. So hopefully i'll be getting some free ish from him.
I have bangs now, its weird. I dont know if i like it or not. So far everyone likes it, but people do lie.
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